Again Away

Howdy All,

I am going on R&R in just a few days, and if you believe that my postings have grown sparse already, then you will find no surprise in the fact that you will not be hearing from me again until the middle of November.

I hope that you all have a wonderful Halloween. Eat lots of candy.

-Pooh out.

Fitness Bears Don't Hibernate

Howdy All,

Okay, I'm trying this new thing called "running." Perhaps you've heard of it? Some have referred to it as jogging, although I hear that there is a debate as to the validity of the term. I had heard rumors of such activities in the past, and promptly dismissed them as hearsay, rumor, and generally adopted by the unbalanced and insane.

Well, call me crazy, but I suppose this desert sun finally got to me, and I have endeavored to become one of the so called "runners" who speak so highly of this archaic method of physical fitness. I say archaic because it was apparently practiced by civilizations as early as the Greeks in strange ceremonies known as the "Olympics." Now, I have been running for quite some time now and have seen vast improvement in my performance, but I am hear to dispel any rumors currently held in regards to this activity.

First and foremost, it is not fun by any stretch of the imagination. Those who might argue otherwise use meditative methods while running or obtain a state of oblivion during the course of the activity in order to push aside the shear monotony and boredom of running . Likewise, far from being a source of renewed energy and physical prowess, it is a brutal exercise that hurts your knees, calves, ankles, feet, and pretty much everything else you can think of. In addition, it causes one to assume the distinct odor of sweat, which is unpleasant at best. Utter nonsense!

Now, it has been argued that it provides both aerobic and cardiovascular benefits, and while I can attest to the reduced body fat I have experienced, I steadfastly believe that my heart will ultimately revolt against my renewed sense of health and, at minimum, go into cardiac arrest, or worse, just explode in utter desperation.

That being said, I keep going, and make the most of it with a forced smile. I have even begun finding a masochistic pleasure in beating myself up with this insanity. Oh the things we do for love.

My advice to any foolish souls who may have entertained the notion of adopting this silly fitness ritual; watch the Olympics from the couch.

-Pooh out.

Spectatorization

Howdy Ya’ll,

I recently spent some time in the “Green Zone,” which, far from being the trendy international playground depicted in Doonsbury, is actually quite the hot spot for insurgent activity. It was only a short visit, slightly increased due to convoy scheduling, but I was returned to home base safe and sound.

As usual, I had the opportunity to make an observation of the human condition, which in this instance I will call the spectatorization of life. Allow me to expound on this point. While there, I spent a good deal of my first full morning in the zone acquiring the requisite ID badge, when I found myself in rather exciting, albeit disturbing event. Upon walking through one of the check points set up between much of the area and the KBR camp, I became restricted, along with several other employees, in one of the more secure buildings at the checkpoint. We were soon to discover that a possible unexploded ordinance, specifically a fragment grenade, had been discovered not more than 50 yards from the building, and had most likely been tossed over the wall adjacent to the area. Of course both tension and excitement were high, as everyone was immediately concerned, but quickly reassured that the reinforced structure we were in would be more than adequate protection from any explosion of such a device. It was then that everyone settled into their spectator roles.

We, as a people are so accustomed to watching “real life” through a screen, that when watching the activities of our security team through the bullet proof windows of the building, it seemed almost detached from those of us inside. I believe we were all eager to see a controlled detonation of the ordinance, myself included, that many had pulled out their digital cameras and began recording. It was shortly into our event when I made my observation. See, eventually someone had to go out there to inspect the grenade while the rest of us stayed safely behind. As predicted, one of the security team, heavily dressed in a padded Kevlar suit, ventured out toward the ordinance. It was then that I realized that this was not just an exciting event heavily laden in special effects, but rather that we were watching someone walking toward their possible death. I realized that I no longer wanted to see the grenade explode. I no longer even wanted the item to be a grenade, but instead began praying that is was a soup can or other such piece of mistaken trash. I knew that if everyone were to receive their anticipated explosion, that is could very well include the life of this poor stranger. I don’t know how many others in the room felt this way, but I know how still the air felt, and how quiet it became in his seemingly endless walk. I believe everyone prayed in their own way for his safe return.

He did return, and the fragment container was empty. It had been tossed over the wall simply as a means of diversion and distraction to frustrate those of us on this side. Our security personnel quickly resumed operation of the checkpoint and let us continue on with our day.

In those few, but very long, minutes, most of us in that building realized that life is not a reality show. Sometimes life means more than cool explosions, and pulse racing excitement. Sometimes just living life is more important than spicing it up. I went about the rest of my day, as everyone else does in the Green Zone, but I spent much of it in thought of those I love and to whom I turn when I am simply living life. I prayed that they were safe as well, and that we would all be together soon enough to go one with our wonderfully monotonous and uneventful daily lives. The sort of days for which I look to with longing and anticipation.

-Pooh out.